CHAPTER 29 WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU’RE NOT…?

CHAPTER 29 – WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU’RE NOT…?

For the first time in almost 2 weeks, Kurt and Adam were alone in the loft. Adam was making some Mexican dish for dinner. He had learned how to cook Mexican during the time he and his family had lived in Texas. He loved to cook and they both loved to eat, so they made a perfect pair, as friends.

While Adam put the finishing touches on their meal, Kurt was checking out Javi’s Instagram page. Javi had been the one to bring up social media and all that was on the Internet. He told Kurt he didn’t mind at all, just as long as if he found something he had questions about that he would ask. Kurt was still avoiding the interviews. He didn’t want secondhand, and possibly false, information. Besides, he wanted to look at some of Javi’s photos to get some ideas for what they were calling “Invasion of the Body Snatchers.” Along with some quirky ideas, Javi and Kurt had discovered they had a similar sense of humor at times.

As he continued browsing, Adam sat down beside him and said, “Do I know you?” They both laughed. “You haven’t missed me?” Then he looked up to the ceiling and asked how things were going with Javi and where he was. He had had to make a trip to LA to fine-tune his new release and discuss some ideas for future endeavors. Ethan had made a short trip home to visit family while TAS took a 4-day break for some sort of conference.

Kurt told Adam that things were fine with Javi. Then, Kurt asked Adam the same thing about Ethan and Adam replied in kind. “Well! Now that we’ve had that informative and riveting conversation about the men in our lives…” Adam said, throwing his hands up, he leaned over to see what Kurt was looking at, startled, and looked up at Kurt, “Woah!” Kurt had been looking at some rather provocative pics of Javi.”

That’s what he looks like under all the colorful clothes, hats and bling????” Kurt knew he shouldn’t say this as it would just lead to more questions, but he couldn’t help himself, “Yeah, I guess so, it doesn’t appear to be an edit, but I really wouldn’t know.” And he went back to looking at Instagram.

Adam stared at Kurt, then said in a confused voice, “You don’t know? What does that mean? How could you not know?” Kurt smiled to himself and replied, “Just what I said, Adam. You’re an intelligent guy. The answer isn’t quantum physics.”

It was rare that Adam was at a loss for words, but he was now…finally he almost whispered like someone might be listening, “You haven’t slept together yet? Come on, Kurt! Then, what have you two been doing all the times when you sent me our privacy text? Playing cards? Watching movies? Knitting? Teaching each other yoga??? Putting together jigsaw puzzles? You can’t be serious!”

“Oh, we’ve just been getting to know each other….” Kurt’s voice trailed off. Adam just shook his head, “This isn’t 1952! We don’t have to pretend we’re something we’re not anymore! You don’t have to “save yourself,” stabbing the surrounding space. He looked at Kurt again and exclaimed, “You ARE serious! So what’s the point to this…celibacy? Or do I really want to know? Damn, Kurt! You’ve been alone for almost 2 years. If things are so fine….well, it sounds far from fine to me!”

Kurt was enjoying this, but at the same time he wasn’t going to try to explain to Adam or anyone else the choices he made in his personal life, and especially not his sex life. And even though he trusted Adam completely (and that was saying something for Kurt), he didn’t think it was right to talk about the decisions he and Javi made together over something so personal. Javi had enough pressure in his public life. He didn’t need it in his private life, too. And, he didn’t want their private life to become fodder for the press, something he really hadn’t thought much about until now.

“Adam, you’re my best friend, but how we spend our time is no one’s business but mine and Javi’s. I’m happy, very happy about our relationship so far. Would you just be happy with me, please? We have our reasons, none of which I plan on talking about with you, at least not right now.”

Kurt tried to turn the tables on Adam, “So! How about you and Ethan? Pretty obvious you like each other. What have you two been doing for the past 2 weeks?”

Adam looked at Kurt and in a semi-mocking tone said, “Oh, getting to know each other. He’s a lot of fun! But I don’t know much about his hobbies or whether he prefers sugar or Splenda. He keeps my mind out of New York. I’d say we’re happy for the time being, not really looking into the future. I’m not sure I even want anything more than the present with Ethan, but I’m enjoying the ride, so to speak”…he said, giving Kurt an “if you know what I mean” look.

Kurt rolled his eyes, then Adam asked, “So, since you’re getting to know each other so well, what’s he like?,” suddenly reverting to the star-struck Adam. Kurt told him things he knew he could find anywhere on Google, his background, the story behind the start of Mateo, what he’d been doing as a solo artist, and he told him that he knew about what had happened to Antonio.

Adam was glad that Javi had told him about Antonio, especially after last Friday. He really didn’t have much of a choice. “But, that doesn’t tell me what he’s like, Kurt.”

“Okay, maybe this will satisfy your curiosity. He’s down to earth, certainly not boring, he’s not stuck on himself, he makes me laugh and cry. He’s honest, almost to a fault. He’s a good listener, easy to be around, interesting…he’s a lot of things I just can’t always put into words. I’m sure you understand that somewhat, you’ve seen him on stage.”

“Of course, I understand that! You’re describing me!” Adam laughed at Kurt. Adam was a little embarrassed to ask but unable to stop himself, “So is a good kisser? Surely, you’ve done that or are you still just holding hands?,” Adam shook his head again like he just couldn’t believe what he was hearing.

Kurt was feeling mischievous, “Actually, yes, he’s almost too good…no, he’s way beyond good, Adam…I could spend the rest of my life kissing him. Would you like me to demonstrate for you? He and I have had quite a bit of practice.”

“Smart ass! Kurt sometimes I just don’t get you at all. If I were in your shoes, I’d have left only kissing somewhere back into early last week. Do you know how many men and women would die to be in your place?”

Kurt thought a minute then said, “You realize this is a mutual decision. It isn’t me waiting around for Javi to be ready or vice versa. We decided this almost from the beginning together. So, would you like that demonstration?”

“No thanks, Kurt. You’re a great guy, but you aren’t Javi. I’ve kissed you before and honestly if he’s better than you I’d want an exclusive, in person exhibition.”

“Well, I could always ask for you..,” Kurt gave Adam a sideways glance, trying not to laugh.

“Okay,” Adam attempted to change the subject. He was tired of Kurt making fun of him, “for the past couple weeks our arrangement has worked well with regard to who’s here when, are we going to have to come up with something else?”

Kurt considered that, then said, “No probably not. If you want to use this place, I can always stay at Javi’s.”

Now Adam was really confused, “But, Kurt, you just said…” “I don’t have to be sleeping with him to stay at his place, trust me!” Kurt was really enjoying Adam’s frustration.

“Fine! Let’s eat!” he said as he almost stomped back into the kitchen and Kurt returned his attention to Instagram. This was another advantage Kurt felt a bit guilty about. Sure, Javi could go to his Instagram page, but he certainly wasn’t going to find pics like these. Yet, he was reasonably sure that Javi was fully aware of what he might find and he seemed okay with that. Then he smiled to himself, oh! Javi was fully aware of what he was doing most of the time.

He grabbed his phone, took a selfie of him blowing a kiss and sent it to Javi, and received one back of Javi seated in a candlelit room. It looked like they were working on a music video. He was dressed in a black velvet suit, a hat to match, a black shirt loose at the neck and a black tie studded with sparkles. He was wearing sunglasses like he had in many of his videos. It did add an air of mystery and it was damn sexy! He’d asked someone else to take the pic. Javi added a string of red lips and hearts and the text said, “the man in the hat will be waiting for you on Friday at his house. Be prepared for an adventure!” The man in the hat was one of the nicknames his fans had given him. They’d talked about what they might do when he got back from LA and he’d asked Kurt to fully engage his imagination and apply it to what they’d planned. He replied, “Imagination engaged and fully focused…on you.” He was glad Adam hadn’t walked in on that text. It was Tuesday evening. Between imagining all the possibilities of Friday night and where it might lead….he didn’t think he’d survive until Friday. On the other hand, all he wanted to do was survive until then, just to enjoy all that was Javi and his ideas of adventure.