NEW YORK! NEW YORK!

Kurt caught the mischievous wink from his dad. Nothing could erase the smile on Kurt’s face tonight! Carole gave his hand a reassuring squeeze as they waited for the graduation ceremony to begin. He could hardly contain his happiness and the pride he felt for Blaine. It had been so hard after Kurt had graduated from McKinley a little over a year and a half ago. Him in New York, Blaine finishing high school in Lima.

He was especially proud of Blaine for staying at McKinley even after Kurt’s move to the Big Apple. His father would have had the transfer papers signed in a New York minute, no pun intended, if Blaine had given him the slightest indication that he was willing to return to Dalton, but by then Blaine had no desire to give up a public school education in exchange for Dalton’s rarified private school atmosphere. Laine still didn’t understand what had prompted his decision to leave Dalton for a school so thoroughly ordinary as McKinley, but he kept his thoughts to himself.

The Glee Club members had embraced him without reservation. At first, he’d quietly kept his distance. He was sure his dual talents of singing and dancing were the main reasons for their warm welcome. After all, they were basically a small group of outcasts and new to the glee club competition scene. They honestly did need what Blaine had to offer! But when the invitations to casual nights at Breadsticks and parties kept coming, he knew he’d found his home.

His friendships in the Glee Club went far deeper than any that he had had at Dalton and staying at McKinley made him feel closer to Kurt, he said.

Laine made small talk with the parents on either side of him while trying to spot Barb in the audience. He found her in the fifth row center with her friend from Appleton, Teresa. He’d almost suggested that they sit together, but this was Blaine’s night to shine. Why make the evening awkward at best and uncomfortable at the least? They had little to say to each other these days….but at least their conversations had become civil, rarely unsheathing their tongues preparing to spar like enemies getting ready to do battle.

That sweet boy, Kurt, she thought. He’d invited her to join him and his parents, but she’d convinced him otherwise, quietly reminding him of the danger of doing so.

Although Laine and Blaine seemed to have come to some sort of workable truce, maybe even a budding father/son relationship, and he knew Blaine had a boyfriend, he didn’t know his name and was adamant that he didn’t want to know. Maybe her concern was unfounded, but she didn’t want to publicly draw attention to Kurt in any way.

At times she still questioned whether the changes she’d seen in Laine were real…..or that there wasn’t some ulterior motive for what seemed like his sudden interest in Blaine. Still, when it came to certain subjects, he still sought ignorance over knowledge, especially self-knowledge, and Blaine’s boyfriend, whomever he may be, could remain in the shadows forever as far as he was concerned.

Blaine hadn’t made it into NYADA, but neither had Kurt the first time he auditioned and, besides, Blaine really wasn’t sure he wanted it that badly. Blaine’s plan was to move to New York and attend New York Conservatory for Drama. Needless to say, his father wasn’t thrilled with his choice and still didn’t understand why he wanted to go to college in New York. There were any number of colleges much closer, even in Ohio for that matter, that offered a curriculum for acting. And besides, he lived in hope that Blaine wasn’t still planning on making the arts his life’s goal and work. In his mind, even though entertainment had become an industry, singing, dancing and acting was not work, a hobby maybe….

Sometimes he was frustrated that there was nothing he could do, even though he was paying for Blaine’s education. He was bound by the hasty promises he’d made to Barb. He hated the power she held over him…but there were other reasons for his reticence if he really looked deeply into his heart. He wanted to continue to improve his relationship with Blaine. Although his itinerary included frequent trips to New York for business, Blaine was becoming a man with his own life. A better relationship with his father probably wasn’t high on his list of priorities at the moment.

Stepping onto the stage tonight was just the first step into a lifetime of finding firm footing in bigger, grander and even more prestigious venues.

Blaine’s passion lay in film. Seeing his name in lights on a Broadway marquee would be great! But seeing his name at the very top of the list as the credits rolled in a movie theatre? That was his dream, his goal! And despite the many colleges with stellar acting programs, the real hub of the film industry was in California.

He and Kurt had spent endless hours fantasizing about their always bright and successful future together. That Kurt was still on the fence about California and Blaine had no desire to remain in New York after he graduated, didn’t dampen the fire between them nor their passion for stardom.

But let the future take care of itself. For now, their dreams lay in New York where Kurt and Rachel’s loft apartment was ready and waiting for Blaine to take up residence. No more lonely months apart….no more tiresome flights to and from Lima and New York…no more endless hours of talking and texting…they could hardly wait!

The graduating class was seated in the first three rows, talking quietly among themselves. Blaine dared to take a stealthy peek at Kurt sitting two rows back, not wanting to attract his father’s attention. Kurt’s half-smile captured his heart, that dimple unconsciously flickering like a tiny beacon begging Blaine to come closer. Blaine tapped his lips, pretending to blow a kiss. Both were looking forward to the after-party, but even more than that they were looking forward to their own after-after party.

Kurt was as excited and relieved as Blaine, imagining his own version of their future. Although Kurt had plenty to keep him busy, Blaine was always on his mind.

New York wasn’t exactly in Lima’s backyard, so they’d only seen each other a handful of times after Kurt’s departure. Mostly when Kurt returned to Lima to visit. Blaine had managed a couple of trips to New York under the guise of checking out schools, and so as not to arouse his dad’s suspicion, his mom had accompanied him. But otherwise Barb had few reasons to actually be in New York. She knew where Blaine planned to attend college already. So she’d drop him off at Kurt’s loft and visit what family she still had for the rest of the weekend.

She’d stopped worrying about Blaine’s private life with Kurt long ago. He was only days away from turning 18; he was more man than boy now and his life was truly becoming his own. She still had reservations, surprised that their relationship had lasted this long, but for Blaine’s sake she remained cautiously optimistic.

Laine glanced at his son, thankful that he at least had some semblance of a relationship with him. Opening up to Blaine had been the single most difficult thing he’d ever done. He’d not only had to change his way of thinking and acting, he’d had to put the one thing that had kept him alive, not necessarily on the backburner, but at least at a lower rung of priority in his life. His profession had defined him ever since he’d started working. It was his shelter from his feelings and every person in his life. Even more than a shelter…it was a cocoon, a tight protective wrapping housing his unwillingness to live his life fully.

He’d been so sure that divorcing Barb and leaving Blaine in her capable hands would set him free…and it had! But certainly not in the way he expected. Yes, the closet door was still firmly closed on his private life, unlike his son, but he’d been freed to make an attempt to build a relationship with Blaine, however tenuous.

He’d come to the conclusion that he’d always need counseling…and now he actually welcomed it! But two years of weekly dinners, a few overnight stays and watching football or a movie did not a deep relationship make. The structure had a solid floor and maybe that’s all it would ever have, but at least they could stand together on a floor; their previous non-relationship had been built on shifting sand, the ebb and flow of the tides and storms of life collapsing the unfinished sand castles that Laine had very half-heartedly attempted to build.

Barb had invited her best friend Teresa to attend this momentous occasion with her and she’d gladly accepted. As her eyes rested on Blaine in his dark red gown, she couldn’t help but remember that long ago day in Appleton. Barb had been fidgety, one finger playing with the handle of her coffee cup, disconcerted. Finally, Teresa had abruptly halted her one-sided conversation and said, “So Barb, what is it that you wanted to tell me?” or something like that. Barb had appeared…..burdened…..ever since her arrival. Barb’s life had been turbulent….unsettled….ever since Laine had asked for a divorce, but still….surely that was better than the so-called life she’d had with Laine. Please, don’t say that he’s changed his mind! Or worse, that she was willing to take him back!

When Teresa had tentatively taken Barb’s hand in her own, her anguished words had tumbled from her lips. Shock had rendered Teresa speechless. Barb had kept this secret for over 18 years and the relieved expression on her face grew with each carefully thought out word. She hadn’t needed to ask, but she had, “Please don’t ever….” Barb hadn’t let her finish. Patting her heart, she’d said, “Your secret is safe…right here.”

Since then, Teresa had made it her mission to remain as close to Barb as possible. Sort of like Kurt and Blaine, they maintained their relationship at a distance, but with great care. Sure, Barb had made lots of friends in Lima by now, but none as dependable or easy to talk to as Teresa. And Teresa was the only person outside of her counselor who knew her life-changing secrets….well, one of them anyway. They both knew Barb might need her someday if and when she ever chose to set it free by telling Blaine…and/or Laine? But surely she would wait until Blaine had graduated from college, wouldn’t she?

And then there was secret #2 that Teresa was fully aware of….but Barb didn’t know that. And as far as Teresa was concerned not knowing might be a saving grace. She wanted to believe that Barb and Laine were long past the animosity they’d carried around with them for all of their married life. They could at least have a reasonable conversation and even met for dinner on occasion to discuss Blaine’s future. What was the point in dropping this particular bombshell? It certainly couldn’t make matters better. No, it would reap more destruction in three lives that had already seen enough destruction. Much better to let them all continue to build good relationships on the ruins of their past.

The ceremony began as Mr. Figgins asked the restless audience to hold their applause until every student had received their diploma. Carole and Burt tried not laugh as they smiled at each other. How many graduations had they been to, hearing that request, only to have it ignored by at least a few? At Finn’s graduation everyone ignored it! Finn had been the star quarterback for the Titans and everyone loved him! No matter that the Titans rarely won a game. As everyone settled in, readying themselves for this all-important ceremony, Burt tried to bring his mind back to the present.

As Blaine crossed what he considered the stage to his glowing future, he adjusted the yellow cord dangling around his neck. He could sense Kurt’s intense gaze focused on him. He’d graduated an honor student not caring that it would have meant more coming from a school like Dalton Academy. Flipping his tassle from right to left, he returned to his seat as the next graduate took his place.

It was almost midnight when Barb and Teresa returned to Barb’s house. Blaine had been given the okay to stay out all night as long as he showed up by 11:00 in the morning, ready for the open house celebration Barb had planned. She had checked with Burt and Carole first since she knew Blaine would almost assuredly be with Kurt. And Kurt was no longer in high school anyway. She trusted him…sometimes more than she trusted Blaine, but she wasn’t oblivious to the mischief that they could get up to in celebrating this milestone. The Glee Club was having its own party, negotiating with their parents for the coveted all night out agreement. The result being a sleepover for everyone at Rachel’s. After all, putting the words party and teenagers together almost always equaled the availability of alcohol.

“How long do we have to stay?” Blaine asked. Kurt gave him that grin that could still take his breath away, a touch of impatience with love that reached all the way to those kaleidoscope eyes. “Come on, Blaine, they’re our best friends and we don’t have to be back at your house until 11. We have plenty of time for our own party,” he said, a sneaky smile forming, “and I can’t wait; and remember I’m driving so I won’t be drinking.” Blaine nodded his head replying, “I’m limiting myself to one drink; I don’t want to be drunk and forget the best part of graduation eve.” They hadn’t seen each other in two months and adrenaline and hormones were running high.

“So, Blaine, when are you are moving in with us?” Rachel asked excitedly, holding Blaine’s hand, a wine cooler in the other. “As soon as I get to New York! No way I can afford to live on my own and three of us living together will be a blast!” Rachel laughed, knowing after two years of living with Kurt and a revolving door of other roommates that living with your friends wasn’t always a blast, but she’d let Blaine find that out on his own. Blaine took a sip of his beer and made a face. Surely there was something better than this to drink if he wanted to celebrate! But it wasn’t like they had a bartender on hand and their supply was a mixed bag of bottles pilfered from family bars and cheap alcohol purchased with fake IDs.

Kurt’s eyes followed Blaine as he made his social butterfly rounds. He envied his boyfriend’s ease with people. He was one of those people who’d never met a stranger, so unlike Kurt. Kurt was friendly, but allowed few to get too close. Blaine was laid back; Kurt was frequently tied up in knots, not always, but what seemed like a lot of the time. Although only in his early 20s life had battered him into the cautious person he was. And that was okay – in this way he supposed opposites did attract. He was yin to Blaine’s yang.

“Still love New York?” Mercedes inquired. It had taken some major rearranging of her schedule to make it back for Blaine’s graduation. Unlike many of her friends, she’d fled the frigid Northwest and headed for California. She’d skipped college altogether. Her single-minded focus was on becoming a pop star. And just like her friends living in New York, she had had to move in with a cousin and her roommates to pay the bills. So far she’d had some real success as a backup singer, knowing she had to pay her dues, but still so anxious to make the big time…and she was determined that she would, without a doubt, she would!

“Yeah, I guess,” Kurt said without the conviction he’d had only a year ago. The truth was the New York winter weather wasn’t dissimilar to Lima – only the city was a million times larger, the snow dirtier, the frigid winds cutting through the layers of clothing a person put on to avoid it. But he still had to finish college at NYADA…and in the back of his mind was Blaine’s desire to find his career in film. Kurt wasn’t particularly committed to theatre, but NYADA was the pinnacle of learning for the performing arts. Why not do what he loved in a place where the average temperature rarely fell below 50 in the winter? He’d love to avoid those zero and subzero temperatures!

Mercedes had made this offer several times before, but she repeated it anyway. “Ya know, you guys are welcome to stay with us until you find your own place,” Kurt smiled and nodded, “and you know all the major connections I have,” she giggled at herself. “The name Mercedes Jones is on everyone’s lips and when they finally realize that fact, I’m changing myself into a single-name artist – just call me Mercedes,” she said with a flair, pretending to bow to an unseen audience. “We’ll keep that in mind,” Kurt laughed as he rolled his eyes, “JUST Mercedes.” He gave her a little finger wave as Rachel grabbed his arm, impatient as ever to drag him away for some purpose of her own.

“Geez, Rachel, can you be any ruder?” “Oh,” she flipped her hand, you can talk to Mercedes anytime.” He gave her an annoyed look, “Yeah, New York and LA? Only a mere three thousand miles apart. I see her almost every day!” “Come on, Kurt, this is important. I want to introduce you to someone.” Anything that Rachel wanted was important….to her anyway.

Giving up, he allowed her to lead him by the hand across the room until they were standing in front of the cream-colored couch in the corner. As they approached, he noticed Sam conversing with some guy that Kurt didn’t know. That wasn’t surprising; there were people all over at this party that he didn’t know, having come to town to join in the celebration of a friend’s or relative’s graduation.

Rachel tapped the stranger on the shoulder, trying to get his attention. Kurt shook his head thinking that at least she hadn’t barged into the conversation shooing Sam away like a queen dismissing one of her lowly serfs.

He glanced up at her with a smile. Sam took his cue and stood saying, “We’ll talk later,” making room for Rachel and Kurt to sit.

Kurt almost took a step backwards, trying to hide his surprise. No introduction was required! If he’d been prepared he would have made an excuse….any excuse! to avoid this awkward meeting.

They’d met when he’d been a freshman at McKinley. Rachel’s stepbrother! He rose to shake Kurt’s hand, but Kurt said, “No, no….um…don’t get up…and we’ve already met.” A flash of surprised recognition….and then a slightly puzzled facial expression…..this was Kurt?! “Yeah, yeah, we’ve….ahhh… met, you don’t remember, Rachel?”

Kurt had been 14 at the time and had only been out for a few months; the best and worst few months of his life. It’d been freeing to finally be himself, but it had also brought the wrath of every bully at McKinley down on him. Uhhhh! He hated remembering those days….and here was a very unwelcome reminder of that time right in front of him.

Clay had been visiting Rachel and her family that summer. She was in the habit of talking about her two gay dads when referring to her parents. She said, “Saying this is my dad, Gene, and this is my dad, Nick,” took too long, answering the questioning looks with an explanation about her two gay dads anyway. If she simply called them her two gay dads people understood it almost immediately.

Clay was Gene’s son. Rachel’s dad had lived a closeted life until he hit 30, married and miserable. The only bright spot being his son, Clay. And he’d always been different. His ex-wife had had two other children before they’d married, neither of whom who had much use for Clay. And although Clay’s mother had been fair enough to “allow” shared custody, she hadn’t been particularly happy about it.

She, too, could tell that Clay was…..different…..much like his father in hindsight. She’d scoured the Internet for information on the role heredity might play in sexual orientation and basically discovered that the jury was still out for the most part. Yes, one’s sexual identity might be slightly influenced by heredity, but the larger opinion was that no one really knew yet what influenced it the most or the least.

She’d wanted to blame it on Gene – how dare he go into a marriage and have a child, all the while knowing he was gay! How could she not have seen it??? Well, the truth was she hadn’t, plain and simple. And she loved her son no matter his sexual “leanings.” She also believed that raising a child without a father when the one he had was eager and willing to be a part of his life would be wrong. So, every summer he’d arrive on Gene and Nick’s doorstep.

The spark of recognition lit up Clay’s brown eyes, “Kurt!” his voice smiled. Turning to Rachel, he said, “You really don’t remember?” Rachel looked from one to the other, completely clueless. “The summer we were freshmen?” Rachel racked her brain, what had she been doing that long ago summer? Oh yeah! How could she have forgotten. Gene had allowed her to attend summer camp for musical theatre and singing! She still treasured the memories of that first trip away from home, the friends she’d made and the valuable lessons she’d learned.

“Oh, that summer! I was at camp and you were already gone by the time I got back! Well great!” she continued, “have a seat, Kurt,” she said patting the cushion. “This is so exciting! I’ve solved the problem of our fourth roommate for next year. Clay lives in New York, too, and his current roommate just moved out. On to greener pastures, I guess. Anyway, I’ve invited him to live with us at the loft.”

No please! Just once he wished Rachel would think about consulting others when her plans included them. He loved her to pieces but she could be so self-centered. But what was he supposed to say? He was her stepbrother and they needed another roommate desperately! And he certainly didn’t want to go into a long explanation about why he had reservations concerning this latest development. “Oh, that’s great,” he tried for some enthusiasm but pretty much failed at his attempt, trying to avoid eye contact with Clay.

As Rachel chattered on, oblivious to the tension sitting on the couch with them, his mind made its solitary trek back to that summer. That conversation with Gene and Burt about Clay’s upcoming arrival. Gene was well aware that Kurt had come out and of his many struggles at McKinley. He didn’t know exactly what he’d hoped to accomplish by introducing Clay and Kurt, but part of him hoped to give Clay someone close to his own age to relate to that summer, thinking maybe he could avoid at least some of the problems Kurt had with the selfish, arrogant bullies, or just help him maneuver some of the still homophobic residents of Lima.

And Kurt had been beyond thrilled! There were very few openly gay people, much less teens, in Lima. And as far as he knew none of them attended McKinley. So, yes, he remembered quite clearly the day they’d met.

Gene had introduced them after having invited Kurt for dinner. Kurt remembered watching his every move as he ate. At 14, confidence already oozed from his body. He appeared totally unafraid of anything and it made Kurt wonder why Gene thought this person would have any problem with bullies. It was obvious he spent time working out. It was obvious that he was at ease with casual conversation….the only kind Kurt ever, ever planned to have with him. The silly idea of revealing his candid thoughts to Clay scared him to death!

And if it wasn’t enough that he seemed able to converse intelligently on most subjects, his physicality tugged at Kurt’s body like a magnet. These feelings scared him! Alot! The only times he’d felt an attraction to another guy were those he found in photos or well-hidden porn. But that was nothing like this! They may be the same age, but they were light years away from each other in physical maturity.

Clay was male through and through, from his deep voice to his muscled physique….and gay. Most of the people he knew still carried around the misconception that all gay men were effeminate. A man was still a man, just as unique from one another as hetero men. He could barely take his eyes off of him! How in the world was he going to relate to someone like this all summer? He’d spend the entire summer trying with little success.

It wasn’t that they hadn’t gotten along with each other. Far from it! Kurt had done his best to introduce him to the very small group of gay friends he had, including Sebastian, despite his better judgement. He had never really liked him, but it was like he came as part of the package. Finding five gay teenagers had been hard enough! And just because he had no use for Sebastian didn’t mean others didn’t like him.

Kurt tried to ignore the crush he had on Clay. He was so sure everyone could see it, but either Clay hadn’t gotten the memo or he didn’t care. The moment he’d introduced him to Sebastian, Kurt could tell he was setting his sights for him and Clay certainly hadn’t resisted his advances.

It didn’t take long before Kurt found himself covering for Clay’s absence. Gene would invite Kurt over for lunch, assuming that when Kurt told him that he and Clay were going to a movie afterwards it was the truth. But it wasn’t. As soon as Kurt slipped into the movie theatre alone, Clay would walk around the corner where Sebastian was waiting in the alley behind the building. He never asked where they went because he didn’t want to know. But, unlike Kurt, Clay was eager to share much more than small talk with him, freely sharing his “experiences” with Sebastian. This was Clay’s first sexual relationship with anyone. He wasn’t bragging; he just wanted someone to talk to about it.

It was obvious to Kurt that he thought of him as a little brother or some sort of confidant, not even taking into consideration that perhaps Kurt had no sexual experience whatsoever. And if he noticed the way Kurt looked at him, he certainly didn’t show it. That had probably been the longest and most agonizing summer of his life.

Having made her announcement, Rachel had left them with, “I guess I’ll let you two catch up then!” And as Kurt took a seat, Clay exclaimed, “Wow, Kurt! Look at you! Did you grow up or what?” With an embarrassed laugh, he said, “Sorry, I didn’t mean that the way it sounded. But you look great!” “Thanks, Clay,” Kurt tried to buy some time by clearing his throat. “So….I guess we’re going to be roomies, huh?”

Clay could hear the caution in Kurt’s voice. He’d grown up as well and every time he’d allow his own mind to recall that summer it filled him with guilt and shame. On this return visit to Lima he’d actually hoped to meet up with Kurt giving him a chance to clear the air. Sure, it had been six years ago, but it seemed like a lifetime. And he hadn’t expected this surprising turn of events, but if he and Kurt were going to be sharing a loft….well, even more reason to apologize and hopefully set the record straight. He should have written him or called or texted….but the fact was he hadn’t.

Clay took a breath, “Look, Kurt….I was a total asshole back in the day and we both know it,” the words couldn’t escape his lips quickly enough. He took another breath and tried to slow down, “I treated you like some sort of servant or something and you were nice enough to let me.” Kurt remained silent, not knowing what to say. Nice was not the word he would have used for his own behavior back then. It was more like resigned. Resigned to the fact that he didn’t stand a chance with Clay, but he’d made a promise to Gene, and he didn’t take that lightly. He’d handled the situation in the only way he knew how.

“It’s okay, Clay, we were kids….” Kurt began. “No, it wasn’t okay….and I hope you’ll accept my apology?” the sentence becoming a guarded question. Kurt ducked his head and nodded, trying to hide the smirk on his face, “Sure….and alright for the record you were an asshole,” Their laughter conceding the point.

“Have you seen Sebastian since you’ve been in town?” “No, thank god! Honestly? He and I used each other that summer. Remember all those gay coming of age movies…like Come Undone? Well, maybe not the best analogy, but we sort of taught each other what little we knew about sex. I tried to keep in touch for awhile, but as it turned out he was an even bigger asshole than I was! I had this idea in my head that maybe we had more than just….well, what we had. But he proved me wrong almost before I went home that summer. There was already someone to take my place by the time he received my first letter. No, seeing Sebastian again is not high on my list of priorities.”

Blaine’s eyes scanned the crowded room…..oh, there he was….but who was the guy Kurt was talking…and laughing with? Hmmm…..no one he knew. He remained at a distance, unconsciously focusing on their body language. There was plenty of space between them, but Kurt’s “friend” kept leaning in as if he was not only trying to capture his words, but also his essence. Oh, come on, Blaine! Really? His essence?

Why this frisson of wariness, distrust…doubt? He really wasn’t the jealous type or at least he thought he wasn’t. But he was struck by an immediate dislike for this…hunk…who was entertaining his boyfriend.

Kurt saw Blaine approaching out of the corner of his eye and without thinking immediately turned his attention in his direction. Two hours had slipped away, enough time to make an appearance, and he was as anxious as Blaine to make an exit. It felt far longer than a couple of months since they’d been together. Soon they’d be together every day and every night…pure heaven!

“Hey, Kurt,” Blaine ventured, testing the waters. He didn’t want to just walk up to him in the middle of what appeared to be an enjoyable conversation and say something like, “So, are you ready to go?” Kurt smiled up at Blaine as he took his hand. Without preamble he said, “Blaine, this is Clay, Rachel’s stepbrother,” Blaine gave him a short nod and half-smile replying, “Nice to meet you, Clay, I’m Blaine Anderson, Kurt’s boyfriend,” God! Did that sound as possessive to them as it had to his own ears?

“Hi, Blaine,” Clay replied not missing the crackle of tension in the air between them…no, he wasn’t as oblivious as he was at 14. Kurt squeezed Blaine’s hand and said, “He’s going to be our fourth roomie when school starts. He lives in New York, too,” Kurt stumbled, well, of course he lives in New York you idiot! “Oh, good!” Blaine said, “I know Rachel said she was having trouble finding another roommate.”

Kurt had thought about explaining the connection and backstory he had with Clay, but decided that could wait until later. Later, when he could assure Blaine that Clay wasn’t a threat. As Kurt stood up to leave with Blaine, Clay stood up as well, dwarfing Blaine by at least four inches. Why did this feel so awkward? Kurt didn’t know, but surely his explanation would clear the air.

“Well, Kurt, if I don’t see you before I leave town, I’ll see you in September. Oooohhh, sounds likes an old song, see you in September,” he chuckled, “and you too Blaine.” Blaine tried to give him a confident look and nod, but it seemed that that was beyond him at the moment. What was wrong with him?

Clay sat down on the couch again watching them standing near the door saying their good-byes. Wow! When he’d made that statement about Kurt growing up he meant it in every way possible! That scrawny, freckle-faced, insecure boy with a chip on his shoulder had turned into quite the stud! Those eyes alone could hold a guy captive for days! Surely a person’s eye color didn’t change as they got older, did it? But his memory certainly would have remembered those rainbow eyes. They literally flashed like a prism! And the freckles had given way to the most touchable porcelain skin he’d ever seen! And he was no wimp in the anatomy department either. It was obvious he spent time in the gym. And if he was going to NYADA keeping in shape would be a must if he was a dancer. No, that person was certainly not the kid he remembered.

And his boyfriend was hot, too! Maybe a little possessive, but damn if Kurt was his boyfriend he’d be possessive, too! And then his wiser self spoke up, “Don’t even go there. Don’t be an asshole a second time.” But it couldn’t hurt to look, could it? It would be great to have a little eye candy around. “You’re on the rebound, buddy.” His wiser self spoke up again and it wasn’t lying.

He hadn’t told Rachel the whole story and hadn’t really felt the need to. It had come as a shock when Angelo announced that he was moving out. He said he wasn’t ready to settle down. Then what in the hell were the last three years about? Had he been ready back then but not now? It made no sense to him, unless Angelo wasn’t telling him the whole truth either. That had only been a couple months ago and he was still smarting from the pain.

And on top of all that…whatever it was…they’d had a sort of open relationship! He’d never asked Angelo to “settle down” as he put it. He loved him, but they’d always agreed that an open relationship worked best for them. It made no sense to him. What he really believed was that Angelo meant he wasn’t ready to settle down with him, but had found someone else he was ready to settle down with. That was just a suspicion…but what did it matter now?

He rose from the couch planning to grab another beer. He was staying right here at Rachel’s tonight so no need to worry about driving. Kurt was hugging Rachel good-bye as he walked past them heading for the cooler. Kurt caught his eye and gave him a wave as he and Blaine headed for the door. Hmmmm…..what kind of relationship did Blaine and Kurt have he wondered, again, stopped short by his wiser self, “Leave it alone.”

Taking the first sip from the can, he went in search of Sam hoping to resume their conversation. He’d seen him chatting with Blaine while he was catching up with Kurt earlier.

As much as he tried to deny it to himself, the tug of war inside was real. He didn’t even remember what he and Sam had been discussing earlier….he was searching for Sam, hoping to find out more about Kurt and Blaine’s relationship. After all, they were going to be roommates, right?

He found Sam leaning against a wall talking with Finn, Kurt’s stepbrother. Oh, even better! he thought, sending his wiser self on a fool’s errand of lies, losing the game…for the time being.